This article is trenchant, mildly acerbic, biting, caustic and cutting. Read at your own risk.

The White House was soundly chastised in the media for not sending a high ranking official to the massive Paris rally for global solidarity. Referring to the gaffe, the President said “Although Attorney General Eric Holder was already in Paris, he had a long standing reservation at La Tour D’argent and just couldn’t pass up their Gourmandise de pommes de terre aux grains de caviar. To be fair, I told him not to include it in his expense report.”

According the White House site the President’s calendar read “No public schedule’. He was seen in the White House kitchen garden tending the spinach, chard and collards with Michelle over his shoulder pointing out the weeds.

The Republican leadership both applauded and soundly renounced the President’s absence in Paris as a way to show how both supportive and obstructive they were.

To make up for the obvious error, the White House determined to ‘get out more’. Press Secretary Josh Earnest then produced a long list of new presidential commitments including attending a supermarket grand opening in Brussels, Cutting the ribbon on a bridge in London and a ‘get out the vote’ rally in Lichtenstein.

A dart board with the countries of the world was set up in the oval office for when there’s a free weekend.

The Pope weighed in on Obama’s absence when he opined, “Although ‘it’s not my job to judge’ you could have caught a cheap overnight flight to Paris with, oh, 20 or 30 of your staffers instead of gassing up Air Force One and dragging along the entire West Wing.

I would have gone to Paris but the Pope-Mobile couldn’t fit under some of those low bridges and anyway I slashed the gas budget for the Vatican. That’s why I make these nightly trips to the trendy Via Borgognona. I’ve been stocking a discount fashion boutique with some of Pope Benedict’s hand me downs. I call it ‘St. Peter’s Britches and Stitches.’”

Writer’s note:

Satire is a humorous instrument for the enlightenment and edification of the intelligent masses. It is a way to bring to the public forum the foibles of the reigning classes and the shortcomings of humanity wherever and whatever they might be and should only be perceived as a truncheon of wit designed to bring a smile and an arched eyebrow to those who ‘get it.’

Having a sense of humor is supportive to good health, but not recognizing that fact and further railing against it in a destructive way is harmful to us all. We must, as a people, continue to promote a healthy attitude toward those who convey the ‘thinking person’s wit and jest’ for the benefit of all.