Kanye West rewrites ‘West Side Story’

The venerable musical ‘West Side Story’ has been given a modern urban touch by Kanye West. Thrill to songs like ‘Maria, I just f%#*ked a b*%ch named Maria’, ‘Tonight tonight, I’ll pop a cap in his a** tonight’ and ‘I Feel Pretty…..Shi#*y’.

Kanye: “This story is based on some people named Romeo and Juliet. They sound Italian. I think they were dancers, but not my kind of moves. Our movie is a lot like the original except it’s not. We open in a candy store except they never sold candy. It was a popular drug drop for the neighborhood run by some dude named Jimmy the nose. He was also running numbers. The kids loved him because he employed them as mules, drops and runners.

Romeo and Juliet were from the middle ages. It was a time before twitter and Snapchat. Romeo loves Juliet but not in a way that he wants to marry her. He just wants a quick weekend. Her mom is not cool with this because she got burned before, and also three kids by other guys.

There’s some kind of balcony scene where she says ‘Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo?’ What does ‘art’ have to do with it? Also ‘wherefore?’ WTF? That’s all changed. She’ll text him.”

"I love the threads from that time"
“I love the threads from that time”