A Louisiana Senator, Elbert Guillory of Opelousas, is opposing a bill that would close loopholes in a state cockfighting ban, saying it threatens the legitimate, less bloody sport of “chicken boxing.”

Guillory says his area of rural Louisiana, like much of ‘Floriduh’ does not “Do things like normal people do. We march to our own washboard.”

He fought to keep cockfighting legal prior to the ban. He said chicken boxing is a sport that uses some of the paraphernalia involved in cockfighting, but he did not specify what paraphernalia that was although “When you tape a chicken’s claws, add padded gloves, and use a referee, then technically, you’re boxing.

Next thing you know, they’ll go after rabbit wrestling and beaver brawling. Then we’ll have nothing to do on a Saturday night.”

Cockfighting is a rural tradition in which specially bred roosters fight to the death to which Guillory retorted, “A TKO in chicken boxing is a win and doesn’t kill the chicken.”

John Goodwin, director of animal cruelty policy for the Humane Society of the United States, said there is no such sport as chicken boxing. Ophelia Boudreau, head of the Chicken Boxing Association says there’s no such person as John Goodwin.

The bill Guillory is fighting would broaden the definition of “chicken” in the current law to include roosters, game fowl and people who are afraid to accept a bet such as ‘chugging a beer upside down.”

“My concern is about the breadth of this bill,” Guillory said. “It covers all chickens. I represent a rural area where people raise a lot of chickens. What if they pick fights among themselves with no one betting? That would be wrong. Someone’s got to make money on this stuff.”