Video screens bring the world up close. That world includes commercials which pay for the content. Thank goodness for ‘truth in advertising’, without it, how would we know all the side effects in those obnoxious ads?

There are so many side effects the announcers reel them off throughout. They included headaches, nausea, depression, irritability, aggression, anxiety, and pain when swallowing. Of course I’m talking about the political commercials and it’s true, they are hard to swallow.

Lately there have been lots of ‘attack ads’. If TV were around in George Washington’s time what kind of ad would we see? Cue the ‘Jaws’ type theme with a deep voice intoning “Washington; the rich man’s candidate.  He’s campaigning everywhere. Does he want to appear on our money too?”

Spoiler alert: George Washington was the first President of the United States right after the revolution. Spoiler alert: The revolution was when the 13 original colonies separated from England. Spoiler alert: we won! Spoiler alert: England was ruled by a king who imposed taxes on the colonies and we thought that was wrong, so we revolted. Spoiler alert: If we still had courses like ‘civics’ in high school you would know this stuff.

When the commercial appears on screen and you hear background music which reminds you of a horror movie, you know someone is going to get slammed. When you see a grainy black and white image of a candidate and it’s the worst picture you’ve ever seen, you know someone’s getting attacked.

It feels like the Presidential race has been going on since the Eisenhower administration, in other words; longer than a Joe Biden speech.

An American election cycle is like having a multi-year toothache that can’t be cured. To put it in perspective, an elephant; the animal with the longest gestation period, could get pregnant, give birth and the baby could be taught to go into any given political spin doctor’s offices, stomp all the literature to the size of a chad and still have time to register and vote. An elephant who votes? In Florida that would not be odd. We invented strange. Why in Miami-Dade County alone 5 out of every 2 people vote.

It’s a Twilight Zone political marathon on every channel and you can’t shut it off. Lonely? Donate to one campaign and they’ll send you mail for years. You become like family. The only ones political mail helps is the poor post office. I’m Buzz Fleischman and I approve this bullshit!