Summer travel season is on us quicker than a skeeter at sunset. What’s the only ‘downer’ when you go on vacation? Is it packing to go or paying the bills after you’re home? Is it finding out that your pet was on Ebay and ordered dog toys from Neiman Barkus? If you answered ‘flying there’ […]
Magical Kingdom security is now ‘characterized’
Assurances from legislators beholden to the gun industry, that more guns in public will alleviate the random acts of mass killing in our streets has been thoroughly debunked. Despite this fact, Disney and other theme parks initiated new protocols at their park entrances. In a press release from Bob Calendrine, security ‘mouse’ at Disneyworld, character […]
Disney axing characters; adding new ones
In a cost cutting move, Disney is subcontracting its characters. The Disney theme parks costumed characters are slowly being replaced by illegal aliens. “Too bad we can’t speak out in public. We’d have a lot to say” said Jimmy Furbisiner, a former Chip of Chip and Dale. “No one knows how hard this work […]
Let’s ship this crap into space
University of Florida researchers have devised a technique that turns human waste into rocket fuel. Did this discovery come about as part of a wild weekend in a frat house? While you’re digesting that sentence, think about the production line this might entail. Students have sold their blood to raise money, why not their […]