Mars One, a privately funded manned mission to send earthlings to live on the red planet by 2024 will need to sell a hell of a lot of T-shirts and coffee mugs to make their nut http://www.mars-one.com/merchandise or they’ll have to call it the ‘Wal-Mart Mission to Solar System Savings.’
The short list for participants is now down to 100 hardy souls. We call them ‘hardy’ because we don’t want to use the term ‘jerks’. This means that 100 people from Earth would rather be somewhere else.
The nonprofit venture to establish a human settlement on Mars, estimates the price tag for the first manned trip at $6 billion, or as a mission scientist states, “If everyone on earth chipped in a buck, it’s a go. We may even have a little left over for an espresso machine on the flight, although I couldn’t imagine what 4 to 6 people in a cramped capsule will do after getting amped on caffeine.”
They announced that after watching more than 200,000 application videos that 100 people ‘without a life’ would be considered. The ones that weren’t chosen were submitted to a new reality show called ‘One way trip; what were you thinking?’
“This selection phase will include rigorous simulations like living on a goat farm in Uzbekistan for 2 years. It’s almost like Mars but with goats” says selection specialist Billy Zabayo.
Most of the prospective astro-nuts hailed from the US with 8 of those from Utah.
You have to ask; what is there about Utah that you can’t get far enough away?
Ken Sullivan one of the early selectees, of Farmington, Utah says he is well aware of the risks and difficulties such a mission would entail such as space-flight complications and living for years with the same four people in a structure the size of a two-bedroom apartment. He said, “in other words it’s just like home except I wouldn’t be able to step out for a cigarette.”
“We’re extremely appreciative and impressed with the sheer number of people who didn’t have a life” said a Mars One spokesperson, “We never thought people would go for this. We’re assembling a video of the most unusual requests and playing it at the Christmas party next year.
Typical applications:
Hello, I am Ashish Vernozeglvenaskaya. 24 years. I live in Uzbekistan and herd goats but have had dream of leaving here for another place for all my life. My interests are people, gaming, science and girls.
My name is Cindi. I’m 26 and a high school graduate who hopes to pay my bills on time. I have always wanted to live on another planet. Hobbies are camping (Which I will put on hold) and collecting friends. Can my dog go?
Kristen Hame I’m 38 and live in Australia north of Kalgoorlie. The men here suck! Please consider me for a place on the ship out of here. Living here is like Mars anyway. I like snake collecting, long walks in the outback and solitaire. I’m a big fan of Bruno Mars, will that help?
Bob Gronstein. 56 years young and a lover of Star Trek which made me want to apply. My mother wanted me to do something besides gaming in my room so here I am. I’m used to hanging out with just a couple of people so I think I would be perfect for this. I’m CPR certified which could be a good skill. I often have gas, will this be a problem?
Mission specialists hope to get the number down to a baker’s dozen for the final cut. “We’ll assemble them in a room and then shut the door for a couple of weeks. If there’s anyone left, they’ll go.”
