During the SCROTUS dinner with the Japanese Prime Minister at Mar A Lago, the question is, why didn’t  the Trump team just get up from the table when they learned the North Koreans had just launched a missile, and discuss the  national security issue elsewhere?

“Someone opened up a laptop, and at the table . . . a group of Japanese people stood around the prime minister and Donald, and they were all looking at the laptop,” said a member of the Mar-a-Lago Club.

We have learned why they didn’t get up.

“The main course will be coming out in a moment” said SCROTUS, brushing aside his national security advisors, “It’s a hand crafted delicacy that I personally chose. The roasted Fourcho lobster with European black truffles will be the best meal you’ve ever had. Let me tell you about it. Your 4 pound ‘Rolls Royce’ of lobsters was not caught, but willingly gave itself up after a full life of discovery crawling through chilly shallow waters  of the bay by the small village of Fourchu on Cape Breton Island in Nova Scotia.

Its extended family was there waving good-bye as it caught a window seat and on the way south, watched in the distance as leaf peepers caravanned into the Maine countryside which put it at ease and softened its firm but tender inner core.

Upon arrival at Mar A Lago it was patted down by one of our own seafood attendants, an American citizen by the way, and sat on its own shelf under a chilled waterfall to catch its breath. At the appropriate time a quartet of trumpeters will play ‘Hail to the Chief’ as it is escorted from its pen and submerged head first into the boiling water as they hold a small non-sectarian vigil. The Lobster will be allowed to rest in a veloute thickened with rue which has been reduced more than Chris Christie after a sweat lodge marathon. It will be de-shelled and grace your plate like a Viking helmet. If you wish, and for an additional $1400 a real Viking helmet can be utilized.

The truffles were found by AKC pure breds in the Périgord region in France and un-earthed among mature oak and hazelnut trees. These particular delicacies were hand chosen and cradled in the arms of the local village virgins while en route to my private jet where they sat in first class and misted with an essence of atmospheres from their native region.”

Now what’s all this about a missile test?”

(Thank you, Elayne Boosler, for a most appropriate title for him.)