In a cable sent from the North Korean Embassy to Washington today, North Korean leader for life and beyond, Kim Jung Un, restated the official position that “There was nothing to worry about, we found that what you thought was a ‘several kiloton nuclear device’ was just a buried pot of vegetables.”
The explosion that North Korea originally said was a nuclear test with a magnitude of 4.9, was later said to be a large jar of kimchi (A traditional Korean dish made of vegetables with a variety of seasonings).Families bury pots of the cabbage in the summer and let it ‘fester and age’ until winter.
The kimchi in question which was apparently forgotten and had been fermenting underground in its earthenware pot for about 35 years, suddenly blew.
“To show you how dangerous this is, a village north of Pyongyang was wiped off the face of the Earth by a high school science teacher’s experiment with some fermented cabbage and radishes” Dim Chop Hoy, a spokesperson for the ex-village’s school board said “That’s why we no longer promote education for impressionable children.”
The Comprehensive Nuclear Test Ban Treaty Organization (CTBTO) concurred with the official denial and estimated the explosion occurred close to where the North conducted its previous two nuclear tests and thereby the mistake.
Tibor Toth, CTBTO executive secretary, said in a statement that the blast “constitutes a clear threat to international peace and worldwide culinary habits.”
He added: “I’m gravely concerned by this action, which deserves universal condemnation … North Korea needs stop eating kimchee once and for all.”