Highway to Hell or stairway to heaven?

 A possible billion-dollar marketplace for the use of medical marijuana is being held up because a Florida legislator is concerned with the ‘look’ of dispensaries. “It’s really important to make sure that the storefronts reflect a true medical environment and you don’t see the commercialization in an inappropriate manner that you see in other states” said Bob Bradley R-Fleming Island.

(True fact, but the following is where we veer from the actual truth)

“You can’t just walk in and order, he said. Patients need to undergo the ‘doctor experience’ and wait in the outer office for a couple of hours, then go to a smaller examining room for another hour, explain their condition to an intern who passes the information on to a nurse practitioner who fills out the forms and gives them to your doctor who then calls the legislator for permission to prescribe your joint.”

“We don’t want to see a “backdoor attempt at recreational marijuana” said another tight assed law maker, “Haven’t we allowed 20 storefront dispensaries for about 20 million patients?” (True fact, but the following, etc……) “We’ll know if it’s used for recreational purposes because we’re stationing ‘pot monitors’ at businesses like Dunkin Donuts and Baskin Robbins and if there’s an unexplained increase in sales, then something, or someone is up.

Marijuana is still federally classified as a ‘schedule 1 drug’  which means the people who make the rules live in a place where Dorothy clicks her heels 3 times and goes home. With an opioid epidemic running wild in America, you would think the lawmakers would  help out with a way to get off the bad stuff and ease into a better head.

U.S. Attorney Jeff Sessions said he would not work with lawmakers to remove marijuana from the list of “Substances that cause limited happiness and then you nod off or look for some Ben and Jerry’s. “It’s a gateway drug” he said, “It will lead to unlimited snacking while watching SNL and Bill Maher. Too much television is bad for the eyes.”

Overdose on pot? Yes, it’s called ‘sleep’.