Let’s combat obesity in America by getting outside and engaging in some physical activity. We’ll walk to the nearest Krispy Kreme Donuts and help celebrate the 1,000th store opening. Why should we walk to Krispy Kreme? Because the gym isn’t handing out free abs during their grand opening, that’s why!

Krispy Kreme is giving away free doughnuts to the first 1,000 customers at every location. “Our vision for Krispy Kreme is as large as our customer’s appetite” said CEO Tony Thompson.

It may be the best two words a ‘sugar-holic’ will hear all day: Free doughnuts.

There is no catch and no quirky requirement, like dressing up in a costume or talking like a pirate. Just be able to squeeze in the front door and you’re not too big to partake of the sweet treat.

Krispy Kreme is the No. 2 doughnut retail chain with a 5% market share, compared to Dunkin’ Donuts over 55% share. “We’d love to ‘eat into’ that figure” said Tony Thompson, “and are calling on all pre-diabetics as well, to help us in our goal.

We’re playing ‘catch-up’ here and need to get that last promotion behind us.

The ‘Ku Klux Kreme Supreme’ didn’t go over as well as we had hoped. Although it sold well in the deep-south, some skinny health oriented liberals had a ‘problem’ with it.

If there’s a large line outside the donut shop, don’t worry, some people could drop out due to health issues and you can just scarf up their place in line.